Actually I’m not really offering my own reasons, but the heading is inspired by the huge number of lists one comes across these days offering reasons for almost everything. There are reasons for eating certain foods, reasons why your relationship has failed or indeed succeeded, reasons why people succeed in their lives and reasons why people fail and each new topic has a number associated with it. It’s as though there are a predetermined number of reasons for each event. I’ve been looking at the lists and this is what I’ve found:
- 1 reason to get a Slavic girlfriend – this seems a bit mean, there must be more surely? Although I haven’t looked into what the 1 reason is – this is a family show after all.
- 2 reasons why the fossil record is incomplete – one of those reasons has to be that we haven’t found them all. I’m just guessing.
- 3 reasons why God exists – now I have a feeling that with just the 3 one would be hard bent to convince Richard Dawkins!
- 4 reasons you should consider kissing a journalist- I think 4 might be stretching it a bit. It does depend on the journalist however.
- 5 reasons pigs are more awesome than you – I rejected the 5 very good reasons to punch a dolphin in the mouth – that was never going to make the list as I suspect we could come up with many more reasons why dolphins are more awesome than us and pigs.
- 6 reasons to ride a polar bear to work – sounds a bit dangerous but no doubt interesting. One to add to your bucket list?
- 7 reasons hip-hop has no billionaires – oh shame, difficult to feel much sympathy here.
- 8 reasons to be excited it’s 2015 – produced by a company that makes diaries maybe?
- 9 reasons your big sister is the greatest gift your parents ever gave you – this was one that I saw but as my parents didn’t give me a big sister instead I went for:
- 9 reasons why you’re a mosquito magnet – because I am. I should probably go back and read this one!
- 10 reasons to avoid talking on the phone – could this be because it uses up the battery and then you can’t use it to take selfies and play games, which is what it was designed for? Or is this conspiracy theory gone mad?
Once you get to the 20’s and above there is a lot of focus on places you should and shouldn’t visit;
- 20 reasons to drop everything and go to Switzerland – okay, chocolate, cuckoo clocks, snow, mountains, reliable watches, cow bells, fondu – you’re going to have to help me here!
We will skirt over the rather preposterous
- 30 reasons not to visit Wales – can’t think of one! Apart from the fact that my husband got a speeding ticket once on the way back from the Brecon Beacons – and that has put him off a bit.
- 40 reasons to choose happiness – how lovely is that?
- 50 reasons people give for believing in God – not bad as we’ve already learnt that there are only 3 reasons God exists
- 60 reasons to embrace being 60 – quite a celebration
- 70 reasons for speaking in tongues – wow, really 70?
Now the next one is going to have supporters from different sides of the health debate
- 80 reasons why drinking alcohol is great
- 80 reasons why we should fast –possibly because we’ve ruined our livers believing the previous line
Something for everyone here!
There aren’t 90 reasons to do anything apparently! Maybe I’ll have to work on that one.
But someone thought there were;
- 100 reasons to vote for UKIP – might need a bit of convincing on that one!